Mommy's Law

Look, I don't know Murphy but one thing I have learned in my 13 months of stay-at-home motherdom is that I need to "expect resistance " as an early mentor once told me. There is a logistical timing in parenthood that must be divine -- meaning, I aspire to it but it is unachievable. Anyone who has ever traveled with a baby or toddler -- or in my situation, both -- know exactly what I'm talking about. If you could compare it to something, let's say mountain climbing, it feels like trying to summit Everest. Take for instance: we're keeping Daddy company on a business trip and staying in a hotel. I think you'll all concede that getting a two and a half year-old and a one year-old to nap at the same time in a hotel is impossible. So, we're out and about exploring and just before nap time one kid falls asleep. Great? No! The other kid is hungry and you know as only the parent can, that the sleeping kid, if awoken, will call that 15 minutes her nap for the day (and she's already two hours short from the night before). So then you obviously think drive-thru which means poor choices for Mommy who's trying to watch what she eats....hold on, lest for a moment you think this is about Mommy. No, no, so we hit the drive-thru so the awake one can eat. Does anyone know at what volume those fast-food joints keep their microphones? It's extra-loud. Every time something (say for example someone barking, "do you want fries with that?") potentially disrupts the equilibrium that is my agenda I feel a little tenser in my innards. And trust me, my agenda is not that of super-mom. It's simple: two kids, one nap each. After we brave the mega-phone that is the BK drive-thru, the awake onel eats and is happy. The car has been idling and the sleeper wakes up unless the car is moving, plus the awake onel is his usual chatter-box self and I need to get the car moving to get him to sleep. So, I head for an open road, no destination, just running with time as my kids regenerate brain cells -- or, in the very least, just wake up in better moods. My bulging bladder will just have to wait.